Robert Hegyes, who played Juan Epstein, the Jewish Puerto Rican wheeler-dealer whose full name was Juan Luis Pedro Phillipo de Huevos Epstein, on Welcome Back Kotter died yesterday. The death certificate was signed by “Epstein’s Mother.” 

The Canyons School District in Utah has decided against using “Cougars” as a mascot for a new high school partly because they say it has a negative connotation. The school’s Single Mom’s PTA Group has decided to adopt it. Meanwhile the school mascot will be the “Chargers,” in spite of the fact that the local chapter of Shoppers Anonymous already uses that mascot.

Ever feel weird buying virtual tools to tend your virtual garden in Farmville? Well, a man in China has you beat—he recently paid $16,000 for a virtual sword to be used in “Age of Wulin,” a multi-player online role-playing game that hasn’t even been released yet. He probably bought it to impress his virtual girlfriend.

A survey by Poll Position found that of those people who knew about Tim Tebow, 43% believe divine intervention is at least partly responsible for his success. Forty-two percent of those polled disagreed, while 14% said they needed to pray for guidance in making up their mind.

At the American Dialect Society’s annual conference Friday, members voted for the Word of the Year. The winner? “Occupy.” Meanwhile, just a few days before, Lake Superior State University’s 37th annual List of Words Banished from the Queen’s English for Misuse, Overuse and General Uselessness included “ginormous,” “man cave,” and yes, “occupy.” You know, as in, “Can’t you find a better way to occupy your time?”

A bluefin tuna was auctioned off at Tokyo’s Tsukiji fish market yesterday for a record price of 56.49 million yen, which is about $736,000. And you think you get sticker shock at Safeway. The $1,238 per pound tuna will be cut into 10,000 pieces and sold by the Sushi-Zanmai restaurant chain for $5.45 per nigiri or $27.25 for a lovely tuna sandwich, mayonnaise and lettuce included.