A Rocky Ending?

Thirty years after Rocky Balboa first made his way into the ring, Sylvester Stallone is bringing him back. For the —*yawn*— sixth time. According to sources, the movie will be about Rocky coming out of retirement to fight a few local fights for the fun of it, then being offered a shot at whupping the champ. Wow, that’s a storyline stretch. Will Rocky take another million-to-one shot? Will the 60-year-old actor have to fight in a wheelchair? Will Adrian finally ask him to quit doing his Brando “Stella!” imitation? And most importantly, will Mr. T come out of retirement to be in the film or will he just pity the poor sucker? The suspense is killing me.

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