And You Thought You Needed A Hug Before

The principal of Percy Julian Middle School in Oak Park, IL, has instituted a Zero Hug Tolerance policy, banning hugging because it’s “more appropriate for airports or family reunions.” Just to make sure this is clear, remember, you can hug at the airport but don’t try to carry more than 3 ounces of liquid on board the plane, you can hug at a family reunion but don’t expect to learn any math there, and you can walk through a metal detector at school, stuff a kid in his locker, and copy the answers from that brainiac who sits next to you, but whatever you do, no hugs.

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