Hasbro has updated the classic game, Clue. For starters, the characters have been given first names and bios. Miss Scarlet is an actress named Kasandra, Mr. Green is Jacob (and now African-American), and both Colonel Mustard and Professor Plum have been demoted to plain old Jack and Victor. Poor guys. Not only that, each character now has a special power to help them discover clues quicker. Don’t bother guessing that someone did it with the lead pipe, revolver, or wrench, they’re history. Nowadays murders are done with dumbbells, trophies, and poison. Oh, and it can happen in the theater, spa, or guest house now. Somehow “Kasandra in the hot tub with the New Age crystals” just doesn’t have the right ring.