Why Do You Think They Play With Leather Balls?

Even though, as exercise physiologist Tommy Boone points out, “There simply isn’t anything in the medical literature to support abstinence,” many players in the World Cup won’t be allowed to have the pleasure. The Argentine and Brazilian teams can. English players can have a girlfriend or wife over but no hanky panky—and they’ll be monitored to make sure they comply. Americans….well, who knows. Coaches won’t say. As for fans, sex definitely won’t interfere with their watching the game, but that’s because they won’t allow it to. A survey in Germany found that 95% of the soccer fans said they’d rather watch their team play than join their partner in bed. No word on whether 95% of German soccer fans’ wives are encouraging their husbands to watch more of the tournament.

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